Kept My Mouth Shut Too Long
by LiquidVamp
Summary: [Ron x Hermione] COMPLETE! Ron and Hermione weathered through good time and bad. Through school, a war, and then normal life. The day of their wedding she faces the fact that she can no longer lie to her self.


**Kept My Mouth Shut for Too Long**

_**A/N: **My muse is simple girl. All she likes are plot bunnies and reviews. So be kind to Maggie and feed her review cookies please._

**_Big thanks to my beta Druscilla for her hard work. _**

_**Credits**: Lyrics, in italics, and title from Mouth Shut by The Veronicas. _

_**Disclaimer**: No copyright infringement intended. All characters are the property of JKR, Scholastic, and any number of other companies with more money than I've ever dreamed of seeing. I didn't make any money off of this, so please don't sue._

**RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH**

She stood in front of the full length mirror looking at her reflection. It was as if someone else was looking back at her from the glass. Sure the face was hers and the body beneath the ivory wedding robes was hers but the soul behind the eyes felt like someone else's. Everything about the day just felt wrong. Hermione brushed the tear away from her cheek before it streaked through her make-up. She couldn't help but think it _should've never gone this far._

The dressing room door opened, her mother stepped through. "Oh you look so lovely dear, the absolutely picture of perfection."

She pasted on a pleasant smile and faced her mother. "Thank you Mum." Her mother either didn't notice the tightness of her voice or passed it off as pre-wedding nerves.

Jane adjusted the tiny tiara that held Hermione's veil and kissed her quickly on the cheek before flipping the veil down over her daughter's face. "There all ready."

Hermione nodded once again plastering on a smile that defied the feeling of dread and wrongness that permeated her entire being.

"Let's head down shall we. The ceremony is about to start". Jane led the way down the stairs of the church. Hermione had insisted on a mixed ceremony with both muggle and wizarding traditions included. Her childhood dream of marrying in a church would not be put aside because she was a witch and not at all religious. Now walking down the steps that led to the main sanctuary she couldn't help but wonder why whatever god there might be out there didn't smite her here and now for daring to set foot in his house, for allowing her self to go through with this…

Her father stood waiting at the bottom of the steps in a black tux that seemed to make him look years younger than he really was. "There's my sweet witch. Are you ready pumpkin?"

She was shocked by his question but went ahead with the expected answer even though she wanted to say something entirely different. "Yes daddy."

"Are you sure? I don't mind stealing you away from here. You know I would do anything for my little girl."

She forced herself to not take him up on his offer of freedom. No she had to do this. "No daddy. I want this, you know that."

"Yes I do, but you can't blame a father for wanting to keep his little girl to himself for just a bit longer."

Her mother parted ways with them, heading to the vestibule where Neville would lead her to the front to light the unity candle that represented their family.

She knew the order. First her mother would light a candle escorted by Neville, then Molly would do the same escorted by Charlie. The mother's would take their seats on opposite sides of the red carpeted aisle. Then the minister and the headmistress would enter with Ron and Harry. The procession would start as their attendants walked ever so paced down the walk. Man and woman arm in arm to the front of the church were they would part to take their places next to their fellow attendants. Then the heavy oak doors would close and the music would change. Pachelbel's Canon in D would come to life and the doors would open…

"Look's like it's our turn pumpkin. You sure you want to do this? It's still not too late."

She nodded a yes not trusting her voice to not betray her feelings to the first man she had ever loved. She couldn't decide if he kept asking because he could see it in her eyes that this whole day was just wrong or if he was doing what every father did moments before he would had over his daughter to another man to take care of forever. She decided she didn't want to know. Knowing might fuel her need to run even more.

She offered her arm in silent acceptance of her fate to her father. He wrapped his around hers linking bent elbows. They took their place in front of the closed doors and waited till the first strains of the wedding march began to play. The doors opened with a graceful flourish. Before her lay her future…a marriage to the man she had been with for some five years; through school, a war, and now peace.

She felt her legs move as she walked down the aisle that seemed to stretch into eternity ahead of her.

They were at the alter in a matter of moments verse the eternity it had felt like to her. Her father lifted her veil and kissed her on the cheek before he took his seat next to her mother.

The traditional Biblical words were read, something from I Corinthians about love being the greatest of all. The reverend went on about the sanctity of marriage and the life long vow to love, cherish, and obey. She didn't listen. The words washed over her threatening to drown her. All she could think was it _should've never gone this far._ May God help her, it should have never gone this far.

The reverends voice broke through her clouded mind. "The vows you are about to take before God and man are an eternal sign of your love and devotion to one another. They show your unwavering devotion to one another through the good and bad times. Please clasp your right hands."

Ron smiles and takes her hand into his.

"Repeat after me; I, Ronald Bilius Weasley take you, Hermione Jane Granger…"

She never heard Ron finish the vows. Her turn came and she repeated without thinking, simply doing as she was told

Once more the reverend's voice seemed to take up her entire mind. "The wedding band is a worldly symbol of your love and devotion to one another. As the gold is strong so is your devotion to one another. As the band is an unending circle so is your love unending even unto death." The reverend passed the first band to Ron he slipped it on the tip her trembling finger. "As you place the ring on her finger please repeat after me. I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness."

He slid the ring to her first knuckle as he repeated the first words. "I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness."

"As I place it on your finger, I commit my heart and soul to you." Again Ron slipped the ring up just a bit more. "As I place it on your finger, I commit my heart and soul to you."

"I ask you to wear this ring as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today, our wedding day." He pushed the ring into place against the base of her finger as he repeated the last of the vows. "I ask you to wear this ring as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today, our wedding day."

The reverend passed Hermione Ron's ring and requested she do the same. She slipped the ring on the tip of his finger as the tears started; silent reminders of a heart in torment. "Please repeat after me…"

She looked Ron in the eye and cried a bit harder. "I'm sorry I just…I just can't. I'm so sorry." The ring dropped to the floor between them as she dropped his hand. She slipped the ring away from her hand that he had just place there and let it fall to the floor with Ron's as she stepped away.

She reached the first row of pews before he could even speak. "Hermione please"

"No". She picked up the hem of her skirt and ran. The aisle that had seemed so long on the walk down now seemed even longer, the oak doors looming too far in the distance.

The tears flowed freely down her face, traces of eyeliner tracked in their way through her foundation.

She pushed through the doors, out through the welcoming hall, out into the courtyard where the sun shown brightly as if nothing was wrong. She ran, ran until her legs couldn't hold her any longer before she collapsed onto the grass covered ground. She dropped her face into her hands and let the tears fall as they may. She never heard the quiet footsteps of her intended drawing near till he was next to her, holding her close as she cried.

"Hermione, please"

"I'm so sorry Ron. I never meant to hurt you. _That this was never meant to last.  
We should've never gone this far._" She couldn't stop herself once she began. Every thought, every emotion poured out as she cried against his shoulder. "_I kept my mouth shut from the start. I guess I left you in the dark. You thought you knew me but you don't. You say you'll love me but you won't when you find out who I am."_

"Of course I will Hermione. I'll always love you." His voice betrayed him. The unmistakable sound of a tear strained voice was his to speak with. "Please Mione come back in there with me."

"_I'm feeling lost when I'm in your arms. The reasons are gone for why I was holding on to you. I tried so hard to be the one. I don't like who I've become._ Can't you see? The things that drew us together are gone. There are no classes to study for, no war to fight, no fears to hide from. It's just you and I heading down a path I'm not meant to travel. I can't be the wife you need Ron. I'm not the type of woman to stay at home and raise a house full of children. I need to spread my own wings and fly. I have to find my own desires before I can ever fulfill anyone else's."

"Mione please. I don't understand. How do I fix this?"

"You don't. _All this time you got me wrong. Now we're in this way too far, I'm about to break your heart, _and _tear everything we had apart. _I _thought that I could make it work if I just tried, but I'm sorry to admit that I have lived a lie."_

She pulled away from his grasp and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before she rose from the ground. "I'm so sorry Ron but I _won't keep my mouth shut anymore_. I should've never let it get this far…"


End file.
